Back in the 80’s, everyone had an exercise video. Jane Fonda, Dixie Carter, and even Ginger Lynn all tried to get everyone off the couches and into shape. Of all the A-List, B-List, and C-List celebrities that starred in their own workout tape, Laura Gemser’s has to be the strangest. Not that I claim to be an expert in the field. I mean, the last workout video I watched was the Cindy Crawford one and I wasn’t exactly watching that for the aerobics if you know what I mean and I think you do.
It’s not the fact that Gemser is such a low rent celebrity that makes this flick so downright weird. I mean, I’m a big fan of Gemser’s Black Emanuelle series and I jumped at the chance to see this. (I’ve watched worse movies that held less promise.) But nothing, NOTHING could have prepared me for… THIS. I have to go on record here by saying that Gemser’s foray into the exercise video field, Looking Good With Laura Gemser is the single most bizarre fucking workout video I have ever seen in my life.
Scratch that: Looking Good With Laura Gemser is the single most bizarre fucking THING I have ever seen in my life.
God where do I begin? Let’s start with the fact that Laura DOESN’T EVEN DO ANY OF THE FUCKING EXERCISES! Mostly, she just sits in a huge wicker chair and commands everyone else to do the exercises while she delivers a monotone voiceover. Early in the video, she tells us that she does these exercises to maintain her figure because she’s a movie star and stuff. We never once though see her do anything other than some simple stretches. Sometimes they’ll cut to a close-up of her on the floor smiling after the exercise is over and done with to make it look like she really did it but even a near-sighted four year-old could tell you she didn’t do shit.
I think the most hilarious part was when she says that “anyone can do these exercises” including her instructor, who happens to be PREGNANT. I know these exercises are decidedly low impact so I’m sure a preggo person could do it, but does that mean that at the end of the video Gemser can SIT on top of the poor pregnant woman like she was a human throne? I can hear her now. “Hey pregnant lady, go do all these exercises. Oh wait, are you tired? Here lay flat on your belly on the floor and prop your feet upwards. Why? Because I’m going to SIT ON YOU LIKE A FUCKING HUMAN THRONE GODDAMN IT, THAT’S WHY!”
The program is only an hour long but I’ll be damned if it didn’t seem a Hell of a lot longer. To add insult to injury, just about half the goddamn video is filmed in slow motion. I’m guessing if they didn’t do that, the video would’ve only been about 25 minutes. To further pad the running time, the last ten minutes of the video is a “freestyle” dance session where all the women just uh… dance. They even do The Robot at one point. I’m not kidding.
Folks, I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried.
How do I even issue a star rating for this thing? Judging Looking Good With Laura Gemser for what it was intended is an easy task. No one in their right mind would ever do any of these exercises. No one in their right mind could stand the nausea inducing slow motion. No one in their right mind would trust an exercise video by someone who was too lazy to do the exercises themselves. No one in their right mind would follow the advice of anyone who sat on a pregnant lady. So in that respect, the flick gets No Stars. BUT… since this is the looniest shit I’ve ever laid eyes on; I have to give it at least One Star for the utter absurdity of it all.
Laura’s best instruction: “Sweat! That’s what I want you to do!”
Emanuelle (Laura Gemser) hates her wealthy hubby cuz he likes to get his friends together and play freaky sex games with her so she hires a greasy hitman to mess around with his airplane engine which leads him to die in a plane crash. Emanuelle wants all of her dead husband’s money but since he left everything to his underage brat of a daughter (Livia Russo), she has to be content with leeching off the kid’s trust fund. She also wants revenge on the folks who used to hold her down while hubby beat her like a piñata, but she ends up falling in love with her ex’s confidant (Gemser’s husband and frequent co-star, Gabriele Tinti) instead. When the meddling hitman shows up and rapes her stepdaughter, it drives Emanuelle on a further quest for vengeance.
Gemser is as hot as ever and has a couple juicy fuck scenes this time out. This entry has a lot more plot than your average unrelated Black Emanuelle movie so her sex scenes are spaced pretty far apart. That won't be too much of a deterrent for die hard Emanuelle enthusiasts though as there are enough scenes of Gemser stark naked to keep them happy. Luckily the despicable hitman also gets to bed down with an assorted bunch of naked trollops to keep you entertained while you’re waiting for Gemser’s turn to disrobe.
Those used to the sleazier Joe D’Amato lensed entries in the series shouldn’t be too disappointed with this flick as it’s got a creepy pedophilia aspect to it that makes the bestiality in Emanuelle in America seem almost tame in comparison. In one scene, Emanuelle’s VERY young stepdaughter takes a LONG shower and NOTHING is left to the imagination. I’m sure she was of age when she made this… uh… right? It’s hard to tell either way because her itty bitty titties looked a little on the statutory side to me. Either that or she’s one Hell of an actress. I won’t even bring up her hard-to-watch rape scene that crosses the line of good taste. I’ll take the Fifth on that one, your honor.
I would have been happy with the soap opera melodramatics and the borderline kiddie porn this movie had to offer; sadly though the ending is so abrupt that it’s liable to give you whiplash. (And I should know as I was rear ended by a pick-up truck last month.) This will hardly matter though to anyone watching this flick for the sole purpose of seeing Russo’s (hopefully) of age body.
The asshole hitman gets the best line of the movie when he asks Emanuelle, “You wouldn’t begrudge me a piece of tail?”
AKA: Emanuelle’s Daughter. AKA: Emanuelle the Seductress. AKA: Emanuelle: Queen Bitch. AKA: Sexy Moon.
Jess (Succubus) Franco directed this awful fake Emanuelle movie and it’s the worse one since Black Emanuelle, White Emanuelle. Inconfessable? Insufferable is more like it!
Emanuelle (Vicky Adams) and her newlywed husband go to a wax museum which gets them so hot and horny that they screw right in front of the display of Humphrey Bogart. Then they go to a strip club owned by a wealthy nobleman (who also narrates) where Emanuelle gets it on with a space cadet stripper (on stage no less). After that experience, she swears off men and just makes out with nothing but over the hill lesbian strippers. This creates a noticeable rift in the marriage (seeing your wife make out with nothing but sexagenarian strippers has a way of bruising the fragile male ego) and they separate. While her husband takes to banging his neighbor, the vile nobledude plans to corrupt Emanuelle by hiring a bunch of guys to gang rape her, which turns her into a full fledged slut.
The sex scenes in this flick go on FOREVER, which normally wouldn’t be a problemo if they were sexy, but for the most part (with the exception of the opening wax museum fuck) the movie is completely devoid of any eroticism. Oh there’s plenty of soft core sex to go around, but it’s shot, edited and performed so stiffly that you shouldn’t expect to be aroused by any of it.
The movie also features some of the unsexiest stripping ever seen on the silver screen. The one chick just kinda takes her clothes off and slowly rocks back and forth from side to side as if she was in an Ambien induced coma. After she finally bares it all (it takes about ten minutes) she coos, “Don’t you want to taste my goodies?” I’ve seen better at Lui’s Canton Inn on a Thursday night. (Of course this girl still had all her teeth, but that’s beside the point.)
The dubbing is equally atrocious. I mean that’s to be expected from a Jess Franco flick, but come on now. It’s generally accepted that the dialogue will be haphazardly dubbed in, but the panting and moaning during the sex is even worse. This one scene where Emanuelle’s hubby is going down on a chick is priceless. He’s got his head buried in her twat and he keeps on breathing heavier than Darth Vader. I mean what’s the heck is he doing down there, giving her pussy CPR?!?!
AKA: Emanuelle Forever. AKA: Emanuelle Exposed.
Olinka Hardiman stars as Emanuelle in this unofficial sequel from producer Dick (Pieces) Randall. Emanuelle desperately wants to forget her life as a stripper and part time prostitute, so she leaves her manipulative pimp and heads to the Cannes Film Festival where she hopes she’ll be discovered and become a star. Once there, she dances naked on the beach, balls an actor on a yacht and has a lesbian tryst with a female director. Even though she gets a part in a movie, she still longs for the indifferent embrace of her misogynistic pimp and in the end, has him fly out to France to pick her up and put her back on the street corner where she belongs.
You know, for a piecemeal, filmed on the sly, cheapjack sequel, Emanuelle Goes to
The sex scenes aren’t very titillating, but they have a certain charm about them. Consider the scene where Emanuelle catches her pimp cheating on her with another ho and he slyly convinces her into having a threesome so he wouldn’t be technically cheating. It’s far from a realistic reaction, but it’s pretty amusing.
Although the flick is fun, and whizzes by at a steady clip (it runs a scant 75 minutes), it still has more than it’s share of debits. The biggest problem is erratic editing. It looks like it was originally filmed as a hardcore flick because the editing is quite jarring during the sex scenes (especially whenever someone is getting a humjob). The slipshod cutting diffuses the sexual tension of these scenes and interrupts the flow of the debauchery. Emanuelle’s constant voiceovers don’t help matters any. She frequently inform us on all things happening in the past, present and future, but the real reason she’s always narrating is because it saves the producers lots of money on the dubbing. There’s also an annoying song that goes “Ting-ta-ta-ting-ting-ting!” a thousand times or so, that will literally drive you up the fucking wall.
Hardiman is quite good and carries the movie with a modicum of pulchritude. She has a sluttiness about her that is very natural and she never once looks like she’s “acting”, which is the best compliment I can give her I guess. She also gets the best line of the entire movie when she says: “He had me trained like a seal, only it wasn’t a horn I had to blow!”
AKA: The Elementary Stud.
Three British pilots go to
I don’t really care what color Emanuelle is, but ALL Emanuelles in these movies should be sex starved slutbags. This Emanuelle doesn’t start getting promiscuous till the very end of the movie, and in fact when we first meet her, she’s a VIRGIN. That’s right you heard me, a virgin. Having a virgin Emanuelle is kinda like having Leatherface use a Cuisinart instead of a chainsaw. It just doesn’t make any fucking sense. Most times in an unrelated Emanuelle sequel, the chick isn’t even called Emanuelle, but in this one they call her Emmy, which is close enough for me.
Lee, once she finally does get nekkid, looks superb, but I can’t help but think what the movie could’ve been like if her character was a raving nympho for the entire movie, and not just the last twenty minutes. She’s quite good at portraying her character’s hot and cold sensibilities and looks sexy enough naked to make you curse the fact that she spent half the movie being such a damn prude.
If you’re looking to get an unrelated Emanuelle sequel that wasn’t directed by Joe D’Amato or doesn’t star Laura Gemser, you can certainly do a lot worse. The problem with the movie is that it often feels more like an extended travelogue of
Emanuelle’s madam gets the best line of the movie when she refers to a pussy as “Only a muscle that needs exercising!”
AKA: Emanuelle in the Orient. AKA: Hong Kong Emanuelle. AKA: Lady of the Rising Sun. AKA: The
A jackass junkie named Daniel (Paolo Giusti) gets pissed because his old lady OD’s on heroin and cheats on him (in that order) so he shipwrecks himself on a desert island. When he realizes that the only food he brought with him was a bottle of booze and a box of Whitman’s Samplers, he gets kinda crazy and smashes his radio along with a bunch of cocoanuts. After about twenty minutes of bitching and moaning, he decides to check the rest of the island out and runs into the beautiful Haydee, played by Laura Gemser.
That’s right folks; it’s another Emanuelle movie where they don’t even bother to call her Emaunelle. I tell ya, only the Italians could get away with this kind of stuff.
Arthur (Let Sleeping Corpses Lie) Kennedy plays Haydee’s grouchy dad who wants Daniel off the island, but Haydee and her brother (Nicola Paguone) like him, so they teach him how to fish using a spear. Haydee and Daniel start making goo-goo eyes at each other and you know what that means: Pretty soon they’re going to be doing the Blue Lagoon Boogie.
Little does Daniel know that her brother has also been slipping her the Christopher Atkins special, which makes things kinda awkward for everybody, including the audience.
For the first part of the movie there’s a whole lot of sub-Cast Away high jinx, except instead of Tom Hanks, we get a nondescript, sweaty, badly dubbed Italian actor. It seems like forever before Gemser finally shows up, but it’s okay cuz when she does, she rarely wears a shirt.
I’m not going to rag on the flimsy plot, sluggish pacing, amateurish acting, cruddy cinematography or lamentable dialogue (“You’re a prisoner… of DOPE!”) because honestly, this movie exists for one reason and one reason only, and that’s Laura Gemser getting naked. She gets naked enough to satisfy her fans and that’s what really counts. The flick may be as involving as watching splooge stains dry on your jeans, but since Gemser’s tits are constantly on display, I can’t get too mad at it. Besides you don’t rent an Emanuelle movie for it’s groundbreaking contributions to cinema, you watch it to ogle Gemser’s rack. And for that reason, I can’t bring myself to give it any less than **.
AKA: A Beach Called Desire. AKA:
For whatever reason, Laura Gemser decided not to reprise her role as “Black Emanuelle” for the first sequel in the long running series, so we’re stuck with Sharon Lesley. She’s nowhere near as hot, sexy or entertaining as Gemser, but at least she’s actually BLACK! (Gemser was Indonesian.) She’s got a nice rack too, so that helps somewhat.
In this installment, Emanuelle has amnesia (stemming from a bombing in
The story is told in flashbacks Rashomon style (some people remember things differently and we see the same scene play out through their different points of view), which makes things needlessly arty. This installment is rather light in the sex and sleaze department and at times almost seems like an R rated version of
Dagmar (House by the Cemetery) Lassander co-stars as the psychiatrist’s frigid wife, and gets the movie’s best line: “Up your fat fanny with you and your Freud!”
AKA: The New Black Emanuelle.
Black Emanuelle, White Emanuelle is notable for being the first Black Emanuelle movie in which Laura Gemser actually received billing. (In the first Black Emanuelle movie she was credited as simply “Emanuelle”.) Other than that, it’s a complete waste of time.
The film finds Emanuelle, “the world’s most famous model” running around the desert aimlessly with her asshole photographer (Gemser’s real life husband Gabriele Tinti). He makes Emanuelle pose nude next to a dead dog and when she doesn’t do it sexy enough for his liking he yells at her. Next he makes her pose naked next to a bunch of slaughtered villagers and when she doesn’t do it sexy enough for his liking, he yells at her and slaps her. Then he makes her pose naked on top of a huge pile of shit and when she refuses, he yells at her, slaps her, then rapes her. In the end, she gets hypnotized by a sex guru (Al Cliver from Zombie) who makes her sacrifice a goat, drink it’s blood then get naked and have a conniption.
You know, a chick flick.
I happen to think that Gemser is one of the sexiest women in the world, but even she can’t make borderline bestiality/necrophilia hot. While the flick has an adequate amount of female skin on display, the bizarre scenes of Gemser popping her tit out and hunkering down next to a dead dog baking in the hot sun is enough to kill any erection you may have built up.
The “normal” sex scenes aren’t erotic in the least and feature a couple of the butchest looking lesbians you’re likely ever to see. In one scene, Cliver gets it on with two women at the same time, but for whatever reason he keeps his head in some old geezer’s lap the WHOLE TIME. Who the heck thought this was sexy? There is one great scene where Cliver busts a nut on some girl’s face, but other than that the movie is an utter disappointment.
Even the weaker entries in Gemser’s Black Emanuelle series have their moments of zany inspiration or erotic tension, but this is the first one I’ve seen that is absolutely worthless. I guess that’s to be expected when your movie is called Black Emanuelle, White Emanuelle and the girl playing “Black” Emanuelle is actually Indonesian. Add that to the fact that there is NO WHITE WOMAN NAMED EMANUELLE in sight! Argh.
At least Tinti gets to overact like a madman and delivers the movie’s only memorable dialogue like “All this fuss over a few dead Arabs!” and “My camera is my eye, my nose, my penis!”
AKA: Emanuelle, Black and White. AKA: Passion
Laura Gemser returns as Emanuelle in the fifth and final installment of the series from Italian sleaze guru Joe D’Amato. This time out, Emanuelle takes on the white slave trade but BEFORE she does that, she masturbates while she watches her friend fuck a black mechanic, goes on an African safari, has a lesbian tryst in the shower, balls a wealthy prince, smokes a hookah in India, has a threeway, watches a nude photo shoot in New York and makes love in a darkroom. THEN she decides to do an expose about white slavers.
When she tries to escape (with the help of a friendly transvestite) she gets captured and nearly gets lobotomized by the evil doctors at “The Clinic”. Fortunately she escapes in a laundry basket, hops aboard a ship home and balls the crew to pay for her voyage.
With Emanuelle and the White Slave Trade, D’Amato delivers a rather tame entry in the durable series. I’ll admit that watching Emanuelle in
Although it takes Emanuelle FOREVER to get to the damn slavers, once she does things start to perk up considerably. (Like my penis.) Despite the relatively low sleaze quotient in this one, Gemser looks amazing as always and there is plenty of female flesh on display to make any fan of the series happy. Gemser’s husband and frequent co-star in these movies, Gabriele Tinti has a small role as a slaver. There’s also a great stream of consciousness theme song called “Run Cheetah Run” that has to be heard to be believed. Here’s just a sample:
Run cheetah run on the prairie, Shamu rapid cheetah is here.
You feel his breath on your back; your heart is breaking, his clothes lapse.
His clothes LAPSE?!? I’m sure something got lost in the translation there, but “Run Cheetah Run” is a hilarious oddity that will probably stay in your head longer than anything else in the movie.
AKA: Emanuelle and the Girls of Madame Claude.
There’s a lot of sexual tension between Zanchi and Gemser, but it’s pretty much a foregone conclusion that Emanuelle’s gonna end up turning into a slut again. While the sex scenes are plentiful, there’s really little variation between them or the actors (most of them are lesbian scenes involving Zanchi) and lack the flair (and sleaze) of previous installments. And although the film is stylish and features a lot of Zanchi in various states of undress, it’s also very episodic and sluggishly paced. It also loses points for tossing out one of those annoying “it was all a dream” endings too.
Emanuelle fans will be disappointed to learn that since Gemser spends most the movie in a nun’s habit (it takes about a half hour for her to finally show a little skin and well over an hour to get a little something-something) it leaves little time for her to get naked, but I suppose it’s worth it because she’s so damn hot. Even though she spends most the movie as a spectator and not a participant, Gemser is still radiant as always. Zanchi is also very hot and usually ends up getting naked in nearly every scene, so that’s a plus. Of the badly dubbed dialogue, the older nun gets the best line when she says, “Bladder trouble is God’s punishment for sinful flesh!”
But I’m getting off the topic here. Where was I? Oh, anyway, so Emanuelle goes to Bangkok and has sex. A lot. First with an anthropologist (played by her husband Gabriele Tinti), then with a host of others, all the while randomly getting naked every chance she gets. Then she gets a sexy massage from an Oriental chick who gives her a bath in a very imaginative way: she jumps in the bubble bath and then rubs herself against Emanuelle’s naked body. Genius. Then she gets naked for her bellhop (who gives her a massage) before going off to watch a stripper pour candle wax all over herself. Next she participates in a pot fueled orgy before getting ANOTHER massage, this time from studly Ivan Rassimov (who would later go on to star in Emanuelle Around the World and Emanuelle in the Country). And so on, and so on, and so on. At one point she gets gang raped, but her promiscuous level is so high that I’m sure all they had to do was ask.
All of this plays against positively one of the goofiest musical scores in the history of cinema. Seriously it sounds like the retard from Deliverance teamed up with The New Christy Minstrels and tried to reach that New Age Enya market or something.
Director Joe D’Amato does a credible job with his first entry in the series and gives the fans exactly what they want to see, namely Emanuelle getting naked and having sex a lot. (Sample of a typical scene: Emanuelle walks into a room and disrobes. She notices someone in the next room all hot and heavy. She bones them. Repeat.) He would go on to direct FIVE sequels (some unofficial, but if it features Emanuelle naked it counts in my book), the most infamous being Emanuelle in America, which is still the best. Emanuelle in Bangkok may lack the later sequels’ sleaze factor and general WTF quotient (although we do get to see a snake fight a mongoose), but it can’t be beat for the sheer amount of gratuitous nudity. I mean you can’t help but like a movie where the leading lady can’t keep her clothes on for more than 48 seconds at a time. (It gets an automatic four star rating if you have a masseuse and/or bathing fetish.)
The dubbing is of course atrocious but adds to the flick’s charm. The dialogue is just as bad, especially when Emanuelle cries out, “I feel naked without my camera!” I mean Jesus Christ lady; you’re naked for 70% of the movie, what’s one more second? But it’s Rassimov gets the best line when he tells Emanuelle, “You’re not like them; you’re different. You understand how to control your ecstasy.”
While not quite as jaw dropping as Emanuelle in America (hey what could be?), it still features one outrageous scene where the Chinese slaver forces a woman to hump a dog while he puts a snake up another girl’s pussy! It’s not on par with the horse fucking scene from Emanuelle in America, but it will do in a pinch I guess.
Although Gemser is stunning and the sex is plentiful and the film is hardly boring it does make a few missteps here and there. The pacing stops and sputters every time D’Amato frantically whisks Emanuelle off to her next exotic location, often leaving the plot in the dust. (Nearly every scene begins with a voice over conversation to clear up just how the hell Emanuelle got there.) Not that the plot hardly matters in a movie like this, but every time D’Amato introduces a potentially interesting character (like the horribly scarred rapist who looks like Darkman’s inbred uncle) or situation (like when some skuzzy politicians throw a girl to a bunch of homeless dudes who unexpectedly rape her) he ends things so abruptly that we never get a satisfying payoff to these scenes. Like Emanuelle in America, D’Amato tosses in some random ass XXX footage during the sex scenes, but they’re edited in so clumsily that they become devoid of any titillation whatsoever.
Despite these major flaws, Emanuelle Around the World remains highly entertaining and is a must for any Gemser or D’Amato fan. Sadly although we see Emanuelle going around the world we never truly see her go “around the world” if you know what I mean and I think you do.
AKA: Confessions of Emanuelle. AKA: The Degradation of Emanuelle. AKA: Emanuelle Versus Violence to Women.
But all that plot stuff doesn’t matter. What matters is the screwing and the laughs. The sex scenes are decent enough and the comedy, while not funny per se is so bad it’s good for a laugh. (It’s about as funny as an episode of Benny Hill.) The awful dubbing and cringe worthy dialogue (“You have the manners of a fish wife!” “I’ll be up at dawn’s crack!” “That’s grist for my mill!”) add to the hilarity. The funniest scene is when someone tells the boy’s father to come outside and he says “I’m coming!” but he’s actually just banging his maid.
Gemser looks great and gets naked a lot as several other babes in the cast do the same. As unrelated retitled Emanuelle sequels go, you can do a whole lot worse. Gemser’s real life husband and frequent co-star Gabriele Tinti also appears as her fiancée.
AKA: Country Nurse.
During the opening credits, Emanuelle stars in an artsy fartsy prison play and promptly gets a tomato thrown in her face, inciting a riot. The next day at lunch, the main bitchy prisoner, Albina challenges Emanuelle to an arm wrestling match, then later tries to beat her up in the bathroom and Emanuelle rips off Alibina’s wig and beats her with it! Meanwhile a gang of male prisoners led by Crazy Boy (Gemser’s real life husband Gabrielle Tinti) are transferred to the women’s prison. They get loose, take the warden hostage, and hole up in a cell block. The gang revels in torturing, killing and raping the female inmates. One guy, Blade uses a razor to cut the girls up. In one of the most sickest acts of revenge ever witnessed on celluloid, the girl takes his razor, puts it in a cork and sticks it up her coochie with the razor facing outward. Then she seduces Blade and when he rapes her… UGH! You won’t even notice the lackluster prison break finale, cuz you’ll still be cringing from the penis slicing scene.
This was sort of a sequel to Mattei’s Violence in a Women’s Prison. Gemser somehow manages to keep her clothes on for this one, but the sheer amount of sleaze, bad dubbing, and hateful dialogue (“I’ll bite your nipples off! And I’ll do it too”!) more than makes up for it.
AKA: Emanuelle Escapes Hell. AKA: Blade Violent
Too bad director Bruno (Night of the Zombies) Mattei doesn’t push the envelope a bit farther. He gives us some lesbian scenes and a dash of sadism, but there are countless other women in prison flicks out there that would gladly give us higher sleaze content for our money. I mean what can you say about a women in prison movie that doesn’t have ONE shower scene? Mattei and Gemser returned the next year with the much better Women’s Prison Massacre.
AKA: Chicks in Chains. AKA: Emanuelle Reports from a Women’s Prison. AKA: Emanuelle in Hell. AKA: Women’s Penitentiary 4.
Of all the sequels this is the craziest and the best. It was directed by Italian sleaze wizard Joe D’Amato, and if you’ve seen his Erotic Nights of the Living Dead or Porno Holocaust, those are just the tips of the iceberg. This movie is so extreme that when David Cronenberg saw this movie he based Videodrome off of it.
Any movie that freaks out David Cronenberg is okay in my book.
This time Emanuelle is an investigative journalist whose lover is her biggest rival. In the beginning of the film, she is accosted and held at gunpoint by the sexually frustrated boyfriend of one of her models. She coolly diffuses the situation by giving him a blowjob! For her first of many “assignments”, she contacts her friend, a boxing manager who gets her into a wealthy businessman’s harem of women. (If you’re wondering why an over the hill black boxing manager would have the 411 on some wealthy white dudes’ harem, don’t worry about it. You’ll soon have bigger logic concerns to worry about later in the film.) All of the women are called by their zodiac sign and are there to serve their master’s every whim. One woman even goes so far as to please his horse named Pedro. In a scene that will actually scramble your brain, we get to see her jerk off the horse in graphic detail.
Mr. Ed never had it so good.
Emanuelle takes some quick snapshots with her James Bond-esque camera and then high tails it out of there as equestrian ejaculation is clearly not her cup of tea. She then jets off to Venice to meet a Duke (played by her real life husband Gabrielle Tinti) and has a rushed three way with him and his wife. She sticks around long enough for an orgy featuring a girl in a cake before retreating to a Caribbean resort that caters to pleasing their clientele (namely rich women) with well hung men. When she’s caught snooping around by the lesbian owner of the resort, she escapes by giving her an aphrodisiac laced cock shaped cookie and seducing her.
Next she goes to Washington D.C. (She FINALLY goes to America!) to get the goods on a senator with connections to the snuff film industry. He dopes her with LSD and takes her to some South American hellhole to watch a real snuff film being made. Then when her newspaper refuses to print the story, she resigns. Reunited with her lover, they go to a far away jungle where he sells her to a chieftain. In the morning, they find out there’s a movie crew filming the tribe and decide they don’t want to be in a movie and leave.
The End.
No seriously that’s how the movie finishes.
As many “What the fuck?” movies as D’Amato’s done, this one is far and away the wackiest. D’Amato’s porn background comes to the forefront with a couple of hardcore scenes during the orgy and resort sequences, but they seem all rather tame next to Pedro.
Gemser is good and looks great naked and would go on to many more Emanuelle flicks. Although her credentials as a serious journalist are rather dubious since we never see her writing her exposes, though she does spend a lot of time using that damn spy camera/necklace/bracelet.
The snuff film sequence (featuring women being impaled on giant dildos, a girl having her mouth ripped apart and a woman having her tits lopped off) are well done and feature some of the best gore found in 70’s Italian exploitation cinema.
Once you’ve seen Emanuelle in America, you’re sanity will forever be in jeopardy. You’ll never look at another horse the same way again. By far, the best hardcore unrelated sequel to a softcore film featuring blatant bestiality of all time.
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