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6 BULLETS (2012) ***

Let me just get this out of the way before I begin this review. I did not have high hopes for this one. The shitty DVD cover along with the generic title didn’t help. Not to mention the awkward quote in the beginning of the film that purports to explain the title. (They never attribute the quote to anyone. Was it supposed to be said by Jean Claude Van Damme’s character? Who knows?) Let’s just say it did not give me confidence.

Then in the opening scene we see Van Damme wearing a terrible disguise. This didn’t do much for me either. But then there’s an awesome scene where he unleashes gallons of whoop-ass on some Moldovan underage sex traffickers, rescues a young boy from slavery, and blows up their compound. Man, that scene rocked.

But right when you’re still floating on the high of that scene, they pull the rug from under you. Van Damme’s policeman buddy calls him back to the building and shows him the corpses of some dead girls. You see, these slavers hide their underage girls in the walls of the building when they think they’re being raided. When JC started kicking ass, they got nervous and tuckered the gals away. Since Van Damme was the one who blew the shit out of the place, he’s basically responsible for killing them.

Well, let me tell ya, Van Damme gets so upset over this that he quits the rescuing-kids-from-sexual-predators business. He starts seeing the crispy corpse ghosts of the girls everywhere he goes so he crawls inside a vodka bottle to make them go away. He also opens up a butcher shop to make a living (and probably keep him in vodka). When an MMA fighter’s daughter gets kidnapped by slavers, he turns to Jean Claude for help.

Let’s just say Van Damme doesn’t keep his butcher’s apron on for very long.

Goddamn, 6 Bullets is the best DTV JCVD has ever made. It has a very Taken kind of feel to it and the action scenes, while brief are very brutal. The film is a little on the long side (nearly two hours), but that’s because it takes its time to fully flesh out Van Damme’s character. He sees dead people (Hey, if Bruce Willis can do it, why can’t Van Damme?), is filled with self-doubt, and he has a turbulent relationship with his son (played by Van Damme’s son Kristopher). This is definitely his best DTV era performance.

After co-starring in the decent Dragon Eyes, and the greatest movie of all time, The Expendables 2 (I haven’t even seen Universal Soldier yet, but I hear great things), 2012 will probably go down in history as The Year of Van Damme.

Well folks, that’s pretty much going to wrap up Kung Fu-A-Palooza for this month. Join me next month for Sybil Danning-A-Palooza.


( 6 comments — Comment )
Dec. 30th, 2012 08:35 am (UTC)
Holy shit, that sounds awesome! I finally got around to watching Expendables 2, so I'm in the mood for some more JCVD.
Dec. 30th, 2012 07:09 pm (UTC)
I think you will find this to be a suitable encore. Van Damme plays his age in this one and it's nice seeing him play a broken down kind of leading man instead of an invincible action hero.
Dec. 30th, 2012 01:41 pm (UTC)
Nice review.

This sounds great! Can't wait to see it. Looking forward to your Sybil Danning-A-Palooza.

We are doing (In honor of his birth month) Lorenzo Lamas month in January and Fred Williamson month in Feburary...Fred-uary.
Dec. 30th, 2012 07:11 pm (UTC)
Thanks man. I think you will enjoy it. I look forward to your Lamas and Williamson reviews.
May. 21st, 2013 11:12 pm (UTC)
I dug this one too. If you don't count JCVD as DTV, then I agree totally, this is his best.
May. 22nd, 2013 09:48 pm (UTC)
Yeah, it was surprisingly solid all the way through.
( 6 comments — Comment )


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