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HIDE AND SEEK (2000) **

Jennifer Tilly and Vincent Gallo drug Daryl Hannah, kidnap her, and fake her death. Tilly can’t have children, so their plan is tie the pregnant Hannah up in the basement and wait the nine months or so before she pops the tot out. Daryl’s husband (Bruce Greenwood) thinks she’s dead, but he does some digging and eventually tries to track her down.

Hide and Seek is one of those “From Hell” movies that were so popular in the ‘90s. This time, it’s the Infertile Couple From Hell who are making our heroes’ lives miserable. Director Sidney J. (The Entity) Furie trots out all the usual clichés you’d expect from this scenario. And while the film contains little to no surprises, Furie still gives it the old college try.

The film at least has the benefit of some good performances. As the mousy kidnapper, Vincent Gallo resists the temptation to go over the top and underplays his character nicely. Jennifer Tilly is still playing her trademark childlike psycho number, but she’s nevertheless entertaining. (I liked her monologue about having a baby with lobster claws for hands.) There’s not much for Daryl Hannah to do but sit in bed and sulk while wearing a fake belly. At least she looks good doing it.

Hide and Seek has a solid enough premise. It’s just that the script plays all its cards too soon and things fizzle out long before the finale. Fans of Tilly will want to check it out just to see her do her thing, but all in all, it’s not worth seeking out.

AKA: Cord.

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