The Video Vacuum (thevideovacuum) wrote,
The Video Vacuum
thevideovacuum

EMBRACE OF THE VAMPIRE (2013) **

The original Embrace of the Vampire is a film I have a strong connection to. When I was a teenager, I happened upon it on late night cable and lo and behold, there was adolescent crush, Alyssa Milano naked and vamping it up. It was love at first sight. I don’t really remember a lot about the specifics of the movie, but the nude scenes alone make it a minor classic in my book.

The appeal to the original was seeing a former child star like Milano all grown up and baring all. The star of Embrace of the Vampire ’13 is Shannon Hinnendael, a relative newcomer. She’s cute, sure, but I doubt anyone will react the same way to her as they do to Milano.

Charlotte (Hinnendael) is a mousy virginal college student going to school on a fencing scholarship. She has trouble fitting in with her classmates and has strange nightmares and visions to boot. Eventually, she learns that she is a half-vampire descendant of a family of vampire killers. Naturally, it’s up to Charlotte to rid the school of her vampire professor.

Unlike the first film, this iteration of Embrace of the Vampire has too much plot. The good news is that it has just enough T & A. There are sex scenes, locker room scenes, lesbian sex scenes, and nude initiation scenes. And thankfully they help to break up the monotony whenever things get slow.

And boy do things ever get slow. Embrace of the Vampire gets bogged down severely at times, particularly when it’s dealing with Charlotte’s strange visions. (I’m guessing they were only there to pad the running time.) To make matters worse, they spend all this time setting up Charlotte’s prowess at fencing, which you would think would pay off at the end. But when she finally does take up the sword against her professor, it takes exactly eleven seconds before he knocks the blade out of her hand. Weak.

Still, Embrace of the Vampire has some kooky moments here and there. For instance, I laughed at the scene where the crazy fortune teller lady sees foreboding signs in her latte. It doesn’t add up to much, but the sheer amount of skin ensures that it’s not a total washout.

Tags: e, horror, horror remake, remake, vampires
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