CALIGULA 2: THE UNTOLD STORY (1982) ***

I know what you’re thinking. Caligula had just about every kind of debauchery known to man. Now along comes Caligula 2: The “Untold” Story. How much more of the story is left to tell?

As it turns out, quite a bit.

Actually, Caligula 2 isn’t really a sequel, but rather a pretty good rip-off. In fact, I think it’s a lot better than the original. It’s definitely one of Joe D'Amato’s sleaziest efforts. If you’ve ever seen a Joe D’Amato movie, you know that’s really saying something.

David Cain Haughton (who was also in D’Amato’s Cave Dwellers) stars as Caligula. While Malcolm McDowell is clearly the better actor, he does an admirable job filling his shoes. He has a knack for really getting into all the assorted disgusting stuff that the character does. I liked the scene where he catches a would-be assassin and orders to have his tongue cut out. He also has the tendons in his arms and legs sliced so he can’t run away. To add insult to injury, Caligula keeps the guy around the palace so he can mock him.

Haughton’s Caligula isn’t an entirely bad guy though. In one scene, he gets one of his wenches to jerk the dude off. I mean, he knows that the assassin’s arms don’t work anymore. So it was nice of Caligula to make the girl lend him a hand. (No pun intended.)

This Caligula is tough, but fair.

The one and only Laura Gemser is the slave girl who wants to get revenge on Caligula. She takes her time to let him notice her, become attracted to her, and eventually invite her into his bed. The funny thing is that he bones her so good that she can’t bear to go through with killing him!

The centerpiece of the film is the long orgy scene that occurs halfway through. It’s rather mind-blowing and it even manages to top the one from the original. Folks, I didn’t think that was possible, but it’s true. Women have sex with dwarves, guys vomit all over the place, and a chick jerks off a horse. I know what you're thinking. It can't possibly measure up to the horse jerking scene in Emanuelle in America. Well, this time the girl in question actually gets mounted by the horse! Thank God that isn't shown, but all the jerking is, and in full detail too.

That’s not all though. Caligula orders virgins to be stuffed with dildos, he rapes and kills, and he even beats a baby to death. Just when you think it can’t get any worse, Caligula ties some guys up and forces rods up their asses till it comes out their chest.

Despite the overall wackness of the proceedings, the film really goes off the rails after the orgy scene. The last half hour is marred by a lot of soap opera stuff with Haughton and Gemser. The repetitive dream sequences further hampers the pacing and adds to the already bloated running time. Still, it’s better than the first one and is easily the second best horse jerk-off movie D’Amato and Gemser ever made. Praise doesn’t come much higher than that.

AKA: The Emperor Caligula: The Untold Story. AKA: Caligula: The Untold Story. AKA: Caligula 2: The Forbidden Story. AKA: Emperor Caligula: Garden of Taboo.