November 3rd, 2008

SHE WOLVES OF THE WASTELAND (1988) ** ½

Only women survived the “bacteriological apocalypse” and it’s up to the evil Persis (Star Trek:  The Motion Picture) Khambatta to rule the wasteland with an iron fist.  That is until the extremely statuesque Kathleen (Bride of Re-Animator) Kinmont comes to town blowing away lesbians with a very big gun.  Women of the future can only breed female offspring, so when one of the chicks becomes pregnant with a male child, it’s up to Kathleen to make sure that whippersnapper gets born.  Pursued by Persis and her horde of scantily clad gladiator women; Kinmont, the pregger chick and “the last man on Earth” make tracks for “the badlands” in efforts to settle down and raise a family.    

 

She Wolves of the Wasteland is kinda like a low budget all-female version of Road Warrior, except that instead of everyone looking for gas, everyone’s looking for a man.  The flick is good for some laughs.  I mean the “futuristic” settings are downright hilarious.  If you don’t believe me, check out that set that consists of nothing but plastic drop cloths.  The bargain bin Thunderdome set-up where Kinmont fights to the death is equally cheesy, but that’s where a lot of the flick’s charm comes from. 

 

I also liked how the budget was so low that they couldn’t afford cars and had to settle for dingos, dune buggies and go-carts instead.  The costumes are also great.  All of the women wear skimpy S & M gear and/or dingy workout clothes for maximum sexiness.  Speaking of chicks, there aren’t a whole lot of naked ones in this movie, although a couple of them DO get nudified while bathing under a waterfall.  They also have stupid names like Cobalt, Rat Tail, Whiplash and Riptide, which adds to the fun.

 

I’m not saying that She Wolves of the Wasteland is the greatest all-female post-apocalypse action movie of all time or anything.  (Things get particularly bogged down once the band of heroines gets tangled up with a bunch of mutants in bathrobes.)  What I am saying is that if you are looking for an all-female post-apocalypse action movie, this is certainly one of them.  This flick has more scenes of Amazon women in loincloths driving around the desert in dune buggies than any I can think of off the top of my head, so it’s got that going for it.  As bleak futuristic sci-fi flicks where pregnant women are the world’s most precious commodity go, it’s a Hell of a lot better than Children of Men.

 

There’s also a bunch of great dialogue filled with pseudo-proclamations like:  “We had a chance to repopulate the Earth and you perverted it!” in there too, so what’s not to like?

 

This sadly was the last role in a feature film for Khambatta, who had previously starred in other post-nuke actioners like Megaforce and Warrior of the Lost World. 

 

AKA:  Phoenix the Warrior.