August 17th, 2009


Don Ready (Jeremy Piven) is a smooth-talking hired gun car salesman who is called in to save a privately owned dealership that’s on the verge of bankruptcy.  Together, he and his elite team of wheelers and dealers try to liquidate the entire inventory over the course of a three day Fourth of July holiday weekend.  Ready has to battle a lot of personal demons (he lost his best friend during a similar Lincoln’s birthday sale) in order to soldier forth and sell some cars.


Jeremy Piven has always been an actor I could take or leave.  In The Goods:  Live Hard, Sell Hard, I could take him.  What can I say?  He sold me.  The supporting cast is just as good.  Everyone from Ving Rhames to James Brolin to Charles Napier to muthafuckin’ Alan Thicke is in this movie.  What makes The Goods funnier than most comedies out there now is that it’s populated with “actors who are funny” instead of “comedians who can act”.  Sure, no one gives a shit about the predictable plot, but at least the actors commit 100% to their characters.  By having the actors play it straight, it makes it that much more funny.


I usually don’t like reviewing comedies.  My only rule for comedies is if it’s funny, it’s good (or “The Goods” I should say).  The Goods:  Live Hard, Sell Hard is really funny for an hour or so until it drops its transmission.  Although it runs out of gas in the third act, The Goods had enough laughs in it for me to recommend it.  Your mileage may vary though.  (Sorry about all the car puns.  It’s late, I’m tired, and I need to get my ass to bed.)


The Goods:  Live Hard, Sell Hard is bar none the best comedy about used car salesmen since the granddaddy of the genre, Used Cars.  It also contains some of the funniest dialogue you’ll hear all year.  My favorite was:  “On TV, when someone dies, they never show the poop leave the butt.”


PS:  Was it just me or did I just see full on pussy lips in an R rated movie?  Look closely during the scene in the strip club where Piven is getting a lapdance by the stripper who wraps her thighs around his head.  She’s wearing a see through black dress, but I swore I saw her hairless snatch in full gynecological detail for at least 5 seconds.  If anyone can deny or confirm this let me know…