The Video Vacuum (thevideovacuum) wrote,
The Video Vacuum
thevideovacuum

AMAZONS AND SUPERMEN (1975) **

 

Man-hating Amazon women ride around the jungle using “worthless” men for arrow practice.  The people’s leader and protector is a dude named Dharma (no, not Jenna Elfman) who looks like a cross between King Arthur and Zorro and uses Vegas magician style technology to dupe them into thinking that he’s a God.  After Dharma is mortally wounded by the invading Amazons, he gets his youthful successor to take over his cheesy costume for him (shades of The Phantom).  The new Dharma joins up with two other “Supermen”, a black strongman (whose superpowers include industrial strength burps) and a Chinese kung fu expert/master swordsman to get revenge on those six foot tall dames.

 

Unfortunately it takes FOREVER for the three “Supermen” to finally join forces.

 

This is positively one of the most bizarre movies I’ve ever seen.  (That alone is a half-hearted recommendation.)  Medieval Times rejects fighting scantily clad women?  Check.  Guys being folded up and bounced around like human basketballs?  Uh-huh.  Tanks made entirely out of bamboo?  You got it dude.   

 

Although there is very little here in terms of “quality” entertainment, the movie is so downright ludicrous that’s it’s pretty hard to completely hate.  The constant comic relief is goofy as all get out and really isn’t all that funny, but that shitbox crazy score will stick in your head for days!  The silly feats of superhuman strength are some of the lamest you’ve seen since The Puma Man (lots of reverse motion effects are used so it looks like someone is jumping ONTO a tall building instead of from it), but it kinda adds to the movie’s ramshackle anything goes charm. 

 

I mean what did you really expect when the Shaw Brothers hire Italian exploitation hack Al (War of the Robots) Bradley to film a batshit insane Supermen vs. Amazon Women movie that goes by at least NINE alternate titles?

 

The old Dharma gets the best line of the movie:  “No peppers, no protection!”

 

AKA:  Amazons vs. Supermen.  AKA:  Amazons Against Supermen.  AKA:  Barbarian Revenge.  AKA:  Return of the Barbarian Women.  AKA:  Super Stooges vs. the Amazon Women.  AKA:  Supermen Against the Amazons.  AKA:  Three Fantastic Supermen.  AKA:  Three Stooges vs. The Wonder Women. 

Tags: a, action, cult
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