I never watched Guy Ritchie’s Swept Away, the much hated vanity vehicle for his wife Madonna, but I can’t imagine it could be much worse than this crap.
The plot is thin: Ritchie regular Jason Statham (sporting far more hair than you’re likely ever to see him with again) stars as a claustrophobic chess playing ex-con who gets duped by two mysterious loan sharks (Andre Benjamin and Vincent Pastore) into ripping off a hot tempered gangster (Ray Liotta). All of this could’ve been acceptable if Ritchie had peppered the film with his trademark memorable characters and surprising bursts of violence. These commodities can be found in Ritchie’s best work such as Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, but Revolver is completely devoid of them.
Since the “twist” ending is as obvious as the nose on your face, Ritchie tries to throw you off the scent by tossing in tons of useless flashbacks, ADD style editing, anime for the sake of anime, and irritating inner monologues by the characters to pointlessly confuse you. The film also keeps doubling back on itself, showing the audience stuff we’ve already seen to make us think Ritchie may have an additional trick up his sleeve, but no. All this erratic editing does is needlessly jumble things up and give you one big fat headache. By the time Ritchie springs the so-called “twist” on you, you’ll be cursing yourself for spending 105 minutes on something you already figured out 10 minutes into the film.
Memo to Guy: Your movies were so much better before you hooked up with Madge. My advice: Quit practicing Kabbalah, stop adopting third world babies and dump The Material Girl.
Ritchie also wrote the screenplay which was “adapted” by Luc (The Fifth Element) Besson. I’m sorry but if I was going to bring in another screenwriter to make sure my movie made sense, Luc Besson would be the last fucking guy I’d choose. Statham and Liotta were also in In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale together, which looks like Citizen Fucking Kane compared to this shit.