The Video Vacuum (thevideovacuum) wrote,
The Video Vacuum

JOYSTICKS (1983) *

Man, I got this movie from Netflix because it sounded like it would be great.  It’s basically Porky’s at a video game arcade.  Unfortunately, the key phrase here is SOUNDED.  Joysticks just flat out sucks.  I used to hang out obsessively in arcades during the 80’s and the intense nostalgia I have for that bygone era was the only thing that kept me watching this turd.


The whole premise has a grumpy parent (Joe Don Baker) trying to close down a small town video game arcade because he thinks it’s a dive.  He hires an obnoxious looking punk rocker named King Vidiot (Jonathan Gries, Uncle Rico from Napoleon Dynamite) to sabotage the place and when that doesn’t work, Vidiot challenges the owner to a video game showdown for control of the business.  Meanwhile, a lot of girls show off their boobs, nerds hump horny MILFs, and a hotdog gets lost in between a girl’s tits.


Again, SOUNDS great doesn’t it?  The problem is none of this is even remotely funny.  I don’t think director Greydon (Without Warning) Clark knew ANYTHING about how a comedy works.  There are no set-ups and no payoffs to any of the so-called gags and there isn’t a single laugh to be had throughout the entire film.  I did like the camera wipes where Pac-Man himself would gobble up the scene though.  And the boobies.  They were cool.


Clark and Baker teamed up again the next year for the slightly less worse Final Justice.

Tags: comedy, j
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