It’s pretty hard to get a guy to watch a movie that has either the word “Wedding” or “Married” in the title, but since it was directed by Jonathan Demme, the dude who did Silence of the Lambs, I figured I’d give it a shot. During the opening credits, I spied the names Fab Five Freddy and Roger Corman in the cast. With a cast like that, what’s not to like right? Unfortunately, their roles must’ve been measured in milliseconds because I don’t remember seeing them at all.
What I do remember seeing is druggie Anne Hathaway constantly bitching and moaning and her sister Rachel flapping her gums non-stop about God knows what for almost two hours. These two fight and bicker and yell and get into more drama (Anne’s in rehab, Anne killed her kid brother in a car accident a long time ago, Anne bitches about no being the Maid of Honor, etc.) than a year’s worth of Lifetime Originals. It’s enough to make you want to puke.
What’s worse is that Demme films everything with annoying handheld cameras that jiggle up and down all the time. (The scene where Anne has to take a piss test being the sole exception.) Seriously dude, it’s a wedding movie, not fucking Cloverfield. Also, Demme has an irritating habit of filming everything in real time. I can kinda/sorta understand that when it comes to some of the wedding shit, but what about the scene that centers on a contest where people try to load a dishwasher in under two minutes? What the fuck is up with that? On the plus side, Anne is pretty good (she didn’t deserve the Oscar nomination though) and I liked the scene where she got into a fistfight with her mother (Debra Winger).
Corman gave Demme his start by letting him direct Caged Heat. Rachel Getting Married is certainly no Caged Heat, I’ll tell you that. My, how the mighty have fallen.