The Video Vacuum (thevideovacuum) wrote,
The Video Vacuum

BLADES (1989) **

Troma released this spoof of Jaws set at a golf course where a killer lawnmower runs around making mulch out of golfers.  It's probably the closest thing we'll get to the aborted National Lampoon's Jaws 3, People 0.  Nearly everything from Jaws has been lifted and transplanted to the country club setting.  There's the greedy owner who wants to keep the murders on the Down Low because the big golf tournament is coming up, the nervous town meeting, the grieving slap-happy mother, the autopsy, the POV stalking shots, and a variation on Quint's famous speech.  Of course, the music is a straight rip-off to John William's iconic score.

The gore is OK for this sort of thing.  We get body parts that end up in sand traps, blood spraying out of the bushes, and limbs being cut to pieces.  We're not really watching Blades for the gore though; we're watching it to laugh.  Unfortunately it isn't all that funny.  It's almost as if the filmmakers didn't know it they wanted to make a horror-comedy or a straight-up spoof.  As a result, the movie falls somewhere in between.


Although the humor is kinda spotty, I did enjoy the suggestive way the horny MILF referred to the hunky golfer's club as his "shaft".  ("It will improve your stroke!")  Since I'm a huge Jaws fan I was probably be a lot more tolerant of this flick than most people.  It's not great or anything but at least it's funnier than Caddyshack 2. 


The police chief gets the best line of the movie when he says, "I've got enough evidence on him to make him do the high wattage jig!”

Tags: b, comedy, horror, troma
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