The Video Vacuum (thevideovacuum) wrote,
The Video Vacuum
thevideovacuum

EVIL BREED: THE LEGEND OF SAMHAIN (2003) ***

What if I told you there was a movie that featured Jenna Jameson, Ginger Lynn Allen, Chasey Lain, and Taylor Hayes that DIDN’T feature blow jobs, pussy eating, doggystyle, threeways, ass to mouth, and cum shots? It DOES feature cannibalistic inbred Druids AND Richard Grieco so it can’t be all that bad.

The plot has a group of teens going out into the middle of some Irish forest where a centuries old tribe of inbred cannibals still practice human sacrifice. Of course years of rampant inbreeding have caused them not to be able to reproduce, so they’re on the look out for some nubile “breeders” too. There’s an annoying “clairvoyant” caretaker who warns the teens they’re doomed and tells them to “stay on the path and out of the woods”. It doesn’t matter though, because the cannibals attack them while they’re in the house anyway.

So what the hell is the purpose of the psychic caretaker you might ask? It’s simple. His only purpose is to get his guts ripped out of his asshole and strangled with them. Brillant.

The “teens” all look at least 40 and make irritating sub-Scream 3 horror movie references. The XXX starlets only appear for a few scenes, but that’s okay though because we still get to see some porn star boobage (only Ginger Lynn keeps her clothes on). The gore is above average and features heart ripping, people cut in half, and of course the incredible scene where the caretaker gets his guts pulled out of his ass and strangled with them.

Porn stars. Richard Grieco. Guts being pulled out the ass. What more do you what from a movie?
Tags: cannibal, e, horror
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