A bunch of bad guys kidnap a little girl from out of her swimming pool using a helicopter in broad daylight. The girl’s hot mom Lillian (Kathy Shower) doesn’t want to involve the cops, so she devises an ingenious plan. She contacts her ex-husband Mike (Dale “Apollo” Cook) and her former lover David (Evan Lurie) and tells them separately that they are both the father. Then Lillian drops the bomb on them and tells them she’s been kidnapped. Apparently, Lillian had consistent taste in men because both Mike and David are kickboxers. When Mike and David first meet, they instantly hate each other and try to kickbox one another. Eventually, they set their differences aside and join forces to rescue their (potential) daughter.
So basically American Kickboxer 2 is just like the Robin Williams/Billy Crystal comedy Father’s Day except you know, with kickboxing. This movie is actually funnier than Father’s Day, so it’s got that going for it. That’s not exactly what I’d call high praise but it is a semi-enjoyable time waster.
I’ve never seen the original American Kickboxer, so I’m a little lost on all the characters' back stories and such. All I know is that this is a passable B (OK, C) kickboxing movie. The action isn’t great and the shootouts are pretty weak. Some of the fights are decent, while others are sloppy and rushed. The upshot to all of this is that there is a
Cook and Lurie have a repartee together that makes the movie watchable. Their banter sorta reminded me of a less beefy, not quite as funny, non-identical version of The Barbarian Brothers. I thought it was funny how the flick kept coming up with stupid reasons to have them fight each other. Like the scene when the villain made them fight to the death. After a brief bout, they manage to escape, but when they’re about to go their separate ways, Cook tries to arrest Lurie and they start fighting again. Then, while they’re in the middle of their brawl, they get jumped by a bunch of thugs and they’re back to being partners. I swear these guys get into a fight every five minutes or so.
Although the movie is by and large a bit lame, it nevertheless had it’s moments. There’s a scene where the handcuffed Lurie almost gets gang raped in a jail cell. I also liked the one long music-less fight scene where the only sounds you could hear was the fighters grunting and the THWACK’s of the punches and kicks. Despite the occasional unintentional chuckle, American Kickboxer 2 just doesn’t have enough consistent WTF momentum to make it a true camp kickboxing classic.
Even though I can’t quite wholeheartedly recommend American Kickboxer 2, there’s no doubt it features some quality dialogue. Some of my favorite lines include:
“If you’re going to play Lone Ranger, you’re going to lose Tonto!”
“If you think you’re a man in bed, why don’t you fight like one!”
“The only piece you care about is the one swinging in between your legs!”