Real Men isn’t quite one of the Greatest Movies in the History of the Human Race, but it is one of those movies that I have seen over ten times, so it gets the automatic Four Star treatment from me. This is one of those flicks that I rented a lot from my local video store when they first opened up because they only had about 50 titles to choose from. Usually a night at the video store consisted of me and my friends renting this, Teen Wolf, and The Invisible Kid. As a ten year old, Real Men was fucking awesome because A) Most of the humor is kinda lame, but perfectly suited to a ten year old boy B) It had some tits and C) It had some tits. Despite it’s flaws, whenever I watch the flick, I feel like a ten year old again; which is about the best compliment I can give a movie.
If you’re a big fan of Jim Belushi and John Ritter, you’ll probably love it too. They’re great together and have a lot of comedic chemistry. Plus, Ilsa herself Dyanne Thorne is in it too, so it’s got that going for it.
Belushi stars as a CIA agent who has to schlep along a meek businessman (Ritter) to a drop site to meet some aliens so they can receive “The Good Package”, a formula to reverse the Earth’s pollution. The Russians want to stop them because they want “The Big Gun” from the aliens. Along the way, Belushi tries to teach Ritter how to be more macho and Ritter shows Belushi the benefit of being more sensitive.
Man, I really do love this fucking flick. It’s got some great comedic set pieces; like Belushi and Ritter’s run-in with a CIA hit squad disguised as clowns (“Who are those clowns?”), Belushi’s one night stand with a dominatrix, and the hilarious scene where Belushi takes Ritter home to meet his dad. Probably the funniest and most memorable part though is when Ritter points his finger, says “Bang”, and actually kills a couple people. I’m not saying it’s Duck Soup or anything, but Real Men’s definitely filled with a lot of laughs.
My favorite exchange between the duo takes place after Belushi bangs a hot Russian spy and lights up a cigarette.
Ritter: “I didn’t know you smoked.”
Belushi: “Only after sex.”
Ritter: “Well, at least you don’t smoke that much.”
Belushi: “About a pack a day.”